How to cope with Overthinking

8 min read

Overthinking, anxiety and worry seem to be very predominant issues in our society. It comes as no surprise, life is crazy and insecure, our lives seem to be turned upside down ever since the pandemic started, and being connected to the news, social media, and work practically 24/7 isn’t helping, either.

But overthinking is not something novel. Humans have been dealing with anxiety and worry ever since we existed, with the difference that in the last few decades this natural anxiety has morphed and grown into what is now a problem rather than a healthy survival mechanism.The question that keeps coming up is "How can I cope with overthinking?"

Why are we so anxious?

Back in the days of our primal ancestors, our worries were valid. Having to run from a wild animal, or being careful when hunting and attacking as to not get hurt is what led us to survive until today.

The worries of our ancestors were very different in their nature than our worries today, though. Anxiety used to be short-lived, usually combined with a survival threat that the anxiety helped to eliminate. There was something we could actually DO about our worries, and what we were anxious about took place right then and there, in the present moment.

Nowadays things are very different. Most people rarely have to fight for actual survival in life-or-death situations. We don’t worry about what is happening right now. We are worried about our career over the next years, exams weeks from now, our parents getting older, retirement, climate change, political changes in the world, etc, etc.

The big difference with most of our problems nowadays is that there is little to nothing we can actively DO about them at this moment. Sure, we can plan ahead, but that will only get us so far.

Our brains are wired to be anxious so that we take action and survive - but if we don’t take action because nothing can be done, we are stuck in a loop of overthinking and anxiety.

How can you cope with anxiety?

There are ways out of this loop of overthinking. Next time you feel your heart and mind racing, try out these things:

Pause and look around

Whether you are overthinking, anxious, overwhelmed, or triggered, this is the number one best thing to do in any of these situations. Pause, take a deep breath and evaluate the situation.

Where are you? What is happening around you? How are you feeling? Where are you feeling it?

Self-awareness is needed in order to improve and change your mindset. Also, once you are aware of what you are feeling and how that feeling shows itself, it will be easier to work with!

Breathe

As simple as it may sound, taking deep, conscious breaths can regulate your nervous system and calm you down.

Try either breathwork or simply prolong your inhales and exhales while focusing on breathing into your diaphragm and belly instead of just your chest.

Meditate

Meditation is a great tool, and I would recommend it to anyone I know. HOWEVER, when you are having really bad anxiety or are feeling super overwhelmed, sitting still might make you feel even worse.

The great thing about meditation is that when you do it on a daily basis and make it a regular practice, you will learn how to cope when severe anxiety comes your way.

If you’ve never meditated and are feeling very anxious, try it out.

Sometimes it can calm you down even when you’re super anxious, especially when you’re an experienced Meditator, but if you feel like you can’t stand it, don’t give up on meditation altogether! Try different coping mechanisms and start a daily meditation practice once you feel a bit calmer.

Look at the bigger picture

One big symptom of finding yourself in an overthinking loop is feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed. To help cope with that, a great technique is taking a step back, looking at the bigger picture, and realizing you’re okay.

Think about the issues you are having now and how important they will be 5 or 10 years from now. Chances are, if there is not much you can do about it right now, you will look back in a few years and realize that eventually, things worked themselves out.

Take action

If you remember from the introduction of this post, what our brain is wired to do with anxiety is stimulating action.

I have found that whenever I take action in some way or another or come up with a game plan, it almost instantly soothes my anxiety.

For example, you might wake up on a Monday morning completely overwhelmed by the fact that you have to work and all the many things that will need to get done this week as well as the personal problems that oftentimes occupy your mental space.

A great help to alleviate this anxiety is to come up with a plan of action. When the above scenario happens to me, what I love to do is get a piece of paper or my planner and write a To-Do List of EVERYTHING I need to get done that week.

Not only will this bring all the many thoughts into perspective a bit, but it will also allow me to let them go from my mind, as they are now safely stored on paper.

Then I will look at this list and write down what I can realistically get done that day. Usually, at this point, I will notice that what seemed so overwhelming at first, can actually be split up into very achievable daily tasks.

This will give your brain the reward of “taking action” (even when the action is just planning your future action out a bit)

Exercise

When being stuck in our head, what we need more than anything is to get back into our bodies. A great way to do that is with exercise. Whether you just wanna go on a walk around the block or get rid of all frustrations during sprints or heavy weightlifting, the mere act of moving your body will make thoughts of worry a lot easier to cope with.

It allows you to move all the stagnant energy in your body and you will be able to think more clearly. Plus, you will get a rush of endorphins, which always helps when dealing with anxiety.

Trust

This is most probably my favorite because once you start practicing it, you will notice that theoretically there is nothing you need to be worried about.

The key to achieving that is TRUST. Not trust in anybody else or any particular outcome. Trust in YOURSELF.

Life is uncertain. Life is ever-changing. And there is no amount of planning or control that would ever change that. And we, wanting to be in control of everything in life, hate that more than anything.

That’s why we resist change and uncertainty so much.

The key to deal with all of life’s uncertainties is to learn how to let go and trust yourself.

A great book on this topic is "Wisdom of Insecurity" by Alan Watts, I can highly recommend it, especially in trying times like these with a pandemic turning our life upside down and the world in utter chaos.

Back to the trust. In order to feel the safety and security that we crave so much from other people and circumstances, we need to learn that the only person who can truly make us feel safe and secure is ourselves!

Look at where you are right now. Your past self went through so many hours of anxiety and worry, and you’re okay. You have coped with every single situation in your life so far, as unpredictable as they might have been.

When you take a few moments to realize that no matter what happens, you will figure it out when the time comes, it gets a lot easier to focus on what you can do right now to work toward your dreams.

Conclusion

Life can get overwhelming at times. It is not our fault we get anxious. Our brains are wired to protect us, and the way that worked back in our ancestor’s times was to be worried when we needed to be, as a call to action.

Nowadays most worries don’t have a particular thing we can do about them, so it is hard to get out of the loop of overthinking.

When you practice certain techniques like breathwork, meditation, working out, journaling, etc, life can feel a lot easier to cope with.

Let me know if you have any questions or what you think!